I was walking across the living room when my 10-1/2 yo looked up from what he was doing and asked me out of the blue, “Does Dad need any deodorant?”

I shrugged – thinking he was brainstorming care package items for our next box – and said, “No, I don’t think so; why do you ask?”

“Well, we were just talking about hygiene at school, and I wondered if Dad used deodorant.”

“Ohhh – you meant does he WEAR deodorant! I thought you meant does he need us to send him some, but I said no because he can buy it at the PX. Yes, Dad wears deodorant. Most grown-ups do; in fact, you’ll probably start wearing it in a couple of years.”

“Can I start wearing it now?”

“Do you think you need it? Do your armpits stink?”

[Walking toward me] “I don’t know – here, wanna smell them?”

“Noooo – you can smell them yourself.” [Demo armpit-smelling motion]

[Attempts armpit-smelling motion with exaggerated sniffs, wrinkles nose and shrugs] “Nah, they don’t smell.”

“Ok, then, you don’t need any deodorant yet.”

Oi vey … this parenting thing should have come with a manual!