Another school year is winding to a close, which means end-of-year awards ceremonies, class parties and yearbook signings. Everyone has a bad day now and then (myself, included), but one of my kiddos has really struggled with making good choices at school the past few weeks. (We’ve decided that our goal for the next school year is for me to not be able recognize the Principal’s phone number on Caller ID.) His teacher kindly wrote a note in his yearbook and said that he had helped her “to become a stronger, better teacher.” I think that is code for: You almost drove me to the loony bin, but I survived.

This same kid reads well above grade-level, can run like the wind and has been on the All-A Honor Roll all year. There are numerous things for which to praise him, but his behavior in the classroom (and hallways … and bathroom … and …) is not on that list. Proverbs 28:23 tells us, “In the end, serious reprimand is appreciated far more than bootlicking flattery” (MSG). Kids need encouragement, but they also need boundaries and expectations. What good would it do him, in the long run, for me as a parent to praise his grades and other achievements but sugar-coat the behavior issues?

That same chapter of Proverbs also says, “You can’t whitewash your sins and get by with it; you find mercy by admitting and leaving them” (v. 13, MSG). I’m going to go out on a somewhat controversial limb here and say that I think we, as a society, placate our kids too much. Of course we want them to grow up to be confident, successful adults, but we err if we think that means that they can get away with whatever they want to as children.

Choices have consequences, and sometimes those consequences aren’t pleasant. If we run to the rescue every time our kids get themselves in a bind, how will they ever learn to fend for themselves? They won’t, and we’ll turn into the type of micro-managing, hovering “helicopter” parents who email or call their college professors to complain about a student’s grades (don’t laugh – it happens!).

Regardless of our age, it is important to own up to our choices, take responsibility for them and learn from our wrongdoings. Let’s focus our prayer time this week on looking at the face in the mirror.