Downtown Waco blanketed in fog

We have had very foggy mornings this week. As I was driving to the school to teach my adjunct class early Wednesday morning, I was thinking about the gloomy feeling that seems to accompany fog. I had started out the day pretty ok, all things considered. The boys and I did a hot cocoa toast and clinked our mugs in my brother’s honor on the 4th anniversary of his death. We speculated whether four years is even enough time to see everything in heaven, or if perhaps he’s still exploring.

Maybe it was the alone time of being in the car, not trying to put on a strong face for the kids, just listening to music that detoured my thoughts. A song came on the radio, “Whom Shall I Fear.” One of my favorite lines says, “The God of angel armies is always by my side. The One who reigns forever, he is a friend of mine.” The song brings to mind Romans 8:31-39, which talks about our ability to conquer our adversaries, with God alongside us. In the interview linked above, songwriter Chris Tomlin mentions a story in 2 Kings 6 where Elisha prayed for a servant’s eyes to be open to see the spiritual army that God had rallied on their behalf.

I love the entire song, but the lyrics that opened the tear ducts went something like this: “Though darkness fills the night, it cannot hide the light.” Four years. I miss him so much, and sometimes it still feels very foggy. And yet, the fog will not linger forever! It will come and go on many a morning, but as surely as the sun rises, the fog dissipates.  God is faithful, and though we cannot always see very far ahead of where we are, in this moment, we can rely on the fact that he is always by our side. I’m so thankful that the One who reigns forever was also a friend of my brother’s, and someday, I’ll get to spend eternity together with both of them!