Grieving Hope (Prayer Devotional for the week of April 24, 2011)

Is it possible to grieve and hold fast to hope at the same time? As Christians, we are taught—and our faith is based on this fact—that we have the hope of eternal life with Christ after death. What an amazing, brain-boggling concept, when you really think about it! The Bible says that to be apart from the body is to be alive with Christ (Romans 8:10-11).

Even so, every year during the days leading up to Easter, grief hits me in the gut like a sucker-punch. No matter how much time passes, sometimes I think of my loved ones in heaven and an unexpected wave of some feeling very much akin to jealousy tumbles over me. Maybe I’m just envious that they get to see the good part before me. Sometimes I feel resentful that I got left behind to pick up the pieces. Sometimes I want them back so badly, it aches down to my bones.

We fill our worship service with songs of hope and rejoicing and longing fulfilled in Christ. Even when I want to wallow a while in self-pity and let the grief bring me to my knees, I am confronted with Truth: there’s still plenty of work yet to do here. God wants to use my time here to teach me, mold me, make me a tool of his own handiwork … until it is time to take me Home, too.

In the meantime, I will raise my hands and cry out to the One who gives me reason to hope in the midst of my grief. Our savior—the one who died, arose and is coming again—is worthy of praise!

Girls’ weekend: a nonet

I couldn’t think of a category to file a post about my recent weekend get-away with two girlfriends, so I thought I’d write a nonet about it. What a wonderful, refreshing time of laughter and relaxation we had together. Everyone needs a little downtime now & then.

Sometimes, the real world overwhelms me:

I need time to rejuvenate!

On and off the job, I have

responsibilities–

endless; no time for

relaxation,

quietness,

just for

me

Conference recap

My debut conference experience was a bit anti-climatic, unless you count the part where I woke up the next morning (ie, today) vomiting with a fever and had to leave early to come home. But, we won’t dwell on that. I’m still running a low fever but managed to have a light dinner and kept it down, so we’ll call that a big improvement.

My panel session yesterday morning went very well. We had a very low turn-out, but I was forewarned by some scholarly friends not to take it personally if few (or no) audience members arrived. We still had a lively discussion, and I received some great suggestions for further research. Once I walked into the room, my nervousness started to melt away, and I felt confident about the material that I was presenting. One of my fellow panelists walked up to meet me, and when she noticed my name tag, she exclaimed that she found my paper fascinating! I was just so pleased that someone bothered to read it. 😉

I will admit that it made me feel much better about the lack of audience when I attended other panels with just a handful of people in the room. They had so many sessions running concurrently; I don’t think anyone had a full house.

It was a great experience, all in all, and I was encouraged to delve into the topic a little further. I’m going to try to expand the paper and see if I can submit it to a journal. There are so many policy implications to explore within persistent worlds (“virtual” environments), and it’s a relatively under-researched area that is ripe for new input. So … we’ll see!

It’s time!

I’m getting ready for my conference debut this morning. I am going to take a few minutes after I’m finished getting ready to sit & review my paper, think through some possible discussion questions, etc.

We received an email from one of the panelists last night who had difficulty with travel arrangements and won’t be able to attend. I feel bad for her, because I know she’s been planning it for a while, just as I have. Consequently, we may have additional time to talk about our individual papers, so I want to be prepared for Q&A.

If you read this before 8am CST, I would greatly appreciate your prayers–for a calm spirit, clarity of mind, and whatever else the Lord lays on your heart to pray for me. Thank you so much!