Fourth grade is the year of the “hygiene” film, but fifth grade is the year of the “puberty” film. They separate the boys & girls, and parents have the opportunity to opt-out of the film, but I thought it would be useful information and help break the ice for further conversation. We’ve been open all along, I think, about “body” questions. The older two asked point-blank a while back how babies are born, so I fielded that question as matter-of-factly as I could on the spot, including some general details about the uterus and birth canal, etc.

I know that Dad had a follow-up conversation with the 5th grader, man-to-man, but they just talked about guy stuff, and I wanted to be sure that he had a basic understanding of what girls go through, as well. Tonight after our tutoring ministry was a perfect opportunity to chat in the car as he and I drove home together. I started by telling him that I know he and Dad talked, but I thought it would be helpful if I told him about girls’ puberty, too, so that he can understand what they go through. I asked if that would be ok (I didn’t want to shove the information on him), and he said yes, so I tried to explain things on his level, as best I could.

I reminded him of our baby birth talk and the special organ called a uterus that girls have. I told him that the uterus lines itself like a helmet to protect the baby, and that’s really awesome that our bodies are built to take care of babies. However, a girl’s body doesn’t know from one month to the next if she’s going to have a baby (insert candid reminder here that we don’t want girls getting pregnant!), so the uterus gets rid of the protective lining. I took a chance on the gross factor and explained that it’s basically bleeding for a few days, usually 3-5, but it could last up to a week. He was ASTOUNDED, I tell you. At first, he said, “No fair – you mean they get to skip school?” and I laughed and said no way – they not only have to go to school, but they still have to do everything else, like P.E., while wearing some kind of a pad to stop the bleeding. He was a wee bit horrified and just said, “Whoa.”

I joked about it a bit and reminded him of the creation story in Genesis, where it says that Adam will have to toil for food, but Eve will have pain in childbirth. I told him that I think Eve got the raw end of the deal. 😉  He said, “No kidding!”

I told him that periods are personal and private, so it’s not something that he needs to go and talk to girls about, but I wanted him to know about them so that he will be compassionate and understanding when girls he knows act cranky or feel bad. I was pretty blunt about how bad cramps hurt (I said something along the lines of: it feels like something inside of your belly is tearing because the uterus is opening & closing ), and I said that it’s normal for girls to feel aggravated or easily upset during this time. I told him it’s called PMS.

After sharing all of that, he said, “Well, you’re a mom, so I think you would know!” I also reminded him that I had a hysterectomy, which means I don’t have to have any more periods. He clued in immediately and added, “It also means that you won’t have six kids! Six boys is a recipe for disaster.” I had to laugh at that!!

I was so grateful for our time together in the car to talk openly about puberty, and I appreciated his openness and understanding. I think he will be genuinely compassionate to his friend-girls, and I hope that this conversation has paved the way to more open communication as he gets older.

Our house has a leak in the hot water line, so for the past week, we’ve been going to my parents’ house to bathe, and I’ve been boiling water to wash what few dishes we’re trying to use. (We are using disposable plates, cups & utensils, but we still need to wash cookware.) The plumbers are scheduled to come tomorrow to begin the repair – hallelujah! (It makes me cringe to say jackhammer and kitchen floor in the same sentence, but I’ll be thankful for whatever it takes to get it fixed!)

All that is to say, my evening “routine” has been a wee bit out of whack the past several days, so I haven’t written much. I am very much looking forward to being able to shower in my own bathroom, wash white clothes in my own washing machine (everything else can be washed in cold) and loading the dishwasher. It’s funny how we begin to look forward to things that are usually bothersome chores when the ability to do them is taken away!