It may sound crazy, but reverse culture shock is a real phenomenon. I experienced it when I returned from China in ’97, and it is on my mind as we prepare for my husband’s homecoming from his deployment to Iraq.
The most peculiar outing that recall when I got back from China was going to the grocery store. Colored ketchup hit the market in full force while I was away, and I was dumbfounded by the condiment aisle. Honestly, who the h3ll needs PURPLE or GREEN ketchup? It’s marketed toward kids, but seriously – if a parent placates their kids’ whims to the point of ketchup color, then I feel for them when they have to put their foot down on really important issues. But, I digress.
At the grocery store in Jinan, the city where I lived and taught, you may or may not find ketchup when you go. It might be there one week, but the next week – tough luck. It either is, or it isn’t. If it is, then lucky you! You buy whatever red bottle you find, because you can’t read the label anyway, so it doesn’t matter what brand it is. If it isn’t there, then you just kick yourself for not buying two bottles last time and suck it up.
There were numerous other hiccups as I learned to re-acclimate myself – most of them positive, but all of them took some getting used to: different city sounds, AIR CONDITIONING, driving and catching myself in mid-sentence because I forgot what word I was about to say (yes, in English) come to mind as examples.
With the exception of a break at Thanksgiving and another one at Christmas before they left the States for Iraq, my husband has been away since early November. I do realize and appreciate the fact that even though it has been a long time, it hasn’t been as long as some other military families have endured, so I recognize their sacrifice. Still, much has happened in nine months. He missed the bulk of the school year and many of the routines that we instilled during that time. I’ve tried to keep him posted on the goings-on here at the homefront, but getting back in the swing of things in person may not be easy.
He’s used to sharing a CHU with one other guy and eating in a mess hall with dozens. What will it be like to be surrounded by five kids clamoring for attention and not getting made-to-order omelettes for breakfast? (I don’t believe that he’s loony enough to think he’ll be served a full breakfast every day, but it’s just an example.)
He’s used to a daily routine; this much is true, but it’s his routine. He hasn’t been responsible to get two kids to one camp, another kid to a different camp and the little two to preschool … all in the same commute. And that’s just one week, because next week, Nos. 1 & 2 might go to a different daycamp, while No. 3 goes back to the one he was at two weeks ago … you get the picture. This school year will be especially interesting, because we will have THREE campuses to cover. Everyone will be in “big school” this year, so that’s five backpacks to check, five homework folders to sign, five Meet-the-Teachers, five lunches &/or lunch $ to distribute, 25 sets of clothes to wash and set out (or monitor the setting out thereof) and five reasons to get out of bed for a drink/light/nightmare/just-one-more-hug.
And, let’s not forget that inevitable field trip tomorrow that the kid forgot to mention, so not only is his required class shirt dirty, but he also needs to pack a sack lunch, and you are out of bread.
Um, yeah – it will take some re-acclimating, I’m sure.
faith, sweat & tears 
Thanks, Angela! That brought me back to the days of Justin and the twins. I can not even imagine 5!! You are in my prayers!
Love ya,
Diane
I have so enjoyed your posts on Facebook, and have kept up with just a few of the minor challenges you have faced. I have been in total awe of the sublime grace with which you have handled all you have been given in the past year. Most of us mortal women would have turned tail and run, but you seem to have just “handled it”….. and I’m sure that you will make Lane’s homecoming seem every bit as effortless and humorous. You do know, though, that with all that testosterone in the air, you are going to have to assert your “pink” every now and then. Be sure and make them respect your rights to be feminine and have the frills and fluffy things in life on occasion.
Dwayne had to re-acclimate when he went from nights to days and was all of the sudden not sleeping when the kids were up, having 45 minutes with them in the afternoon as he got ready and coming home when they were asleep and being up all night (because he had to be able to be up until 4 or 5 if they worked overtime). I cannot imagine if there were 5, or if he had at least not had the weekends to be there and be a part of the madness. I’ll be praying that all of it goes as smoothly as possible, but most of all praising that Lane is coming home, safe and sound. Love you girl!
why is it called “reverse” culture shock?
When I got back from Spain (after only a month), I was used to walking everywhere & annoyed at how the U.S. isn’t set up for that.
I can’t imagine what he is going to go through upon his return.
The great thing is that you’ll toss him right back into the fire and he will probably love ever min of it.
BTW–God Bless you on your kid shuffle. I can’t image coving so much ground in the morning. I hated it when I had one in school and one in Pre-school. This is my last year with both at the same school–but at least when E goes to middle school next year she’ll be old enough to get on the bus by herself.