Sometimes I find myself purposely not thinking about something sad because I’m afraid that if I do, then it will overwhelm me and I’ll break down into tears. Once I start thinking about one sad thing, then another comes to mind, and another … There is so much grief around me this week, and I don’t feel like I’ve been a very good friend to people who may need me because I’m not allowing myself to think about it much.

A dear friend is grieving for a Stage IV cancer diagnosis/brain tumor of another friend of hers. I am praying for both of them, but it breaks my heart so much, I don’t want to dwell on it. She is a young mother of two. 😦

One of my uncles died of a heart attack a few days ago, and my two cousins are taking care of the arrangements. My heart breaks for them, and then my mind wanders to the prospect of dealing with my own parents’ death someday … and not having my brother here to help me. At least my cousins have each other. Then, I feel guilty for thinking that, because it sounds heartless; they have each other, but they lost their dad! I must sound terribly selfish.

Today, a friend from church posted a prayer request for her uncle, who has sepsis and acute renal failure — both diagnoses are fatalities waiting to happen, from what I understand. I know that God is still in the miracle-working biz, but sometimes – for reasons I will never understand – my prayers don’t get answered in the way I would like.

In a different sort of grief/stress, I have a close friend who has been out of work for months, and I hurt for her — I know too well how difficult that is.

I needed to get my mind off of those things, so today after work, I rearranged the laundry room and reclaimed “my” room (the “pretty” room where the piano, fireplace, curio and my porcelain doll collection are … the room that was never supposed to have toys, laundry or clutter … my testosterone-free haven from the chaos) by moving all of the laundry baskets into the LAUNDRY ROOM. Fancy that! Tomorrow, I will clean the bathrooms and tidy the study. Now that school is out, we can sort papers and file away the special ones to keep and recycle the rest.

Housework can be a stress reliever, and it’s a relatively simple way to see a tangible result for my efforts. It can also be stressful, seeing as I don’t have a lot of time to do it, but when I carve out the time (like I’m planning to this weekend), then it helps to divert my thoughts and keeps me from wallowing.